Here is Why Physical Attraction isn’t Equal to Long Term Relationship
When we start dating someone, it is difficult to say for sure if we like them for who they are or what they look like. Now, even to like someone for who they are, on a basic level, we have to find them attractive. We often say that looks do not matter but in real life, they definitely do. Case in point is all these dating apps that this generation uses, we ‘swipe right’, ‘like’, or ‘superlike’ people based on their photographs and therefore their looks.
Even organically, we only walk up to people at bars and social events when we find them attractive. We do not really feel inclined to go talk to people because they ‘look’ like ‘good’ people, now, do we?
That being said, a little bit of shallowness is not wrong, I mean you are supposed to find your partner desirable. That is just how it works and especially at the beginning of a relationship when you set the building blocks for it. However, there is a lot going on, on a physiological level as well. When we meet someone and “like” them, spending time with them releases dopamine inside your bodies, which is known as the happy hormone. So when you are hanging out with your new partner, being intimate with them and you feel indescribably happy, you know who you have to thank.
But wait, there is more. The feeling of the high that you get from your dopamine may feel like you have taken a drug, but it is natural, which means that this feeling will wear off in a while and then you will be able to look at your relationship more objectively, in a practical scenario and as a part of the social matrix that you are both embedded in.
It is then that the real test of your relationship begins.
Hollywood has messed with all our perceptions of what a relationship should be like. It has always depicted magical, unrealistic relationships where two people in love are perfect individuals first, which makes sure that they never stop liking each other.
Adding to these factors are the reality dating shows, in which really attractive people are brought together to maintain viewership and a feeling of undisturbed bliss, which assures that no unpleasantness takes place on the show. Example of shows like this is The Bachelor, where stunningly beautiful women and men who look like Greek gods are made to date each other.
One must also remember that participants of these shows are not actually on them to fall in love and meet the love of their life; they are on the show because it is great exposure and almost assures a great career on television!
A great and long lasting relationship needs more than just two people wanting to sleep together. There has to be a deeper understanding and regard for the well-being of the other person.
If you meet someone and fall in love with them, take your sweet time to judge if it really is love.