Studies Show That Husbands Stress Women Twice as Much as Children
It’s true. How many women often spoke about their husbands to their colleagues, best friends, or their mom that their husband is acting like a child? It’s because he is. Women often play the chef in the house, maid, chauffeur, nurse, teacher, and feel like they are in charge to parent their kids, but also their husband. Many women feel like they have less and less energy to do these everyday-tasks, especially if they have a lot of working hours outside their home. And, most of them are feeling like they don’t get any help from their partners.
A survey made by today gave us the percentage, over 7000 moms who took the survey found that the average mom rates her stress levels 8.5 out of 10, and 46% of women say their husbands are causing more stress than their kids. A life of a mother can be very tough and challenging, especially if their husbands are half of their reason to cause more stress.
Researchers summarized:
1. Moms stress about not having time to finish their tasks in one day
2. 3 in every 4 moms with partners say they do most of the parenting and household duties
3. 1 in every 5 moms says that not having enough help from their spouse is a major source of daily stress
What’s interesting about is that researches from The University of Padova have made an interesting analysis through their work, which includes lifelong partners and their connection and stress levels, and how they are coping with it. Apparently, when one of the partner dies, for example when husbands loses their wives, their health deteriorates, but when women loses their husbands, their health is better and they are coping far better with stress, depression and sorrow. The researchers suspected this was because the men relied more heavily on their female partners than vice versa.
Why Are Husbands Stressing Their Wives Out?
There are definitely two sides of the problems, and especially when two or more people are involved. When both of the partners are working a lot of hours off home and come home late, they have no time or less time to do their home responsibilities. Women are expecting that these responsibilities should be in half for both of them, to get help from their partner, to show support and offer support, but most of the time these home duties are falling on woman’s shoulders. Even in families with both working parents, or just partners, it’s considered a common thing that the woman should do all the work of the home.
How to Fix It: If you notice that you and your partner don’t have an even split of the responsibilities, talk with him about it! It may help if you mention to do a list together, of the tasks that must be made and which task should one get, make it for a week and see it that helps. You can also make a shared calendar that both of you can easily access on the phones and be reminded of the tasks that are awaiting you, so no one has to be worried.
Wives Can Step Back More
It’s pretty easy sometimes to say that your partner doesn’t do any work at home, but often than not, they want to be the best partners and the best parent as they can be! The problems sometimes can be if the woman doesn’t trust their partner enough to land him tasks, so she takes them upon herself.
How to Fix It: Women often have fantasies and fantastic visions about how their household and family should be, so they like to make those visions reality, and they end up getting tired of it themselves. Ask your partner to do some of the work! It might sound easier if you do everything yourself perfectly how you want it, but you also need to care for yourself, your sleep, your free time, and maybe just relax for a bit. Even if that means that the kids tomorrow will go to school with a clashy outfit. Take your resting time.
Put Some Spark In Your Relationship
It seems that after the marriage, it’s easier to steady-back your relationship and focus on work and other stuff more. But, that’s not how relationships work! Before anything else, you’re individuals, partners, lovers, and love is what connected you. Don’t refuse to share loving times together, it will be better on the long run.
How to Fix It: Make a settlement with your partner to have a day of the week that allows no work, no business phones, no kids, just both of you. Keeping connection between yourselves strong enough can help you solve problems easier, will make you remember of the good old days when it was just you and your loved one, and most importantly, remember how important you are for yourselves and your marriage. If you are happy and content, and still feel love for each other, the kids will feel the love and will be happier. A happy marriage and a stable love life is not an easy thing to achieve, but it’s one of the most essential things that you can give to yourselves and your loved ones.
Source: Healthy Holistic Living
Not even twice but thrice